Blind Love 5

dedicated to all my anons ;**
………………………………………………
Joury:

I woke up and joined 5alty and lulu for breakfast all because of Jessie’s nagging…I didn’t feel like it…all I wanted was Saif…his comfort...his warmth….which I lost last night…I felt this void…this deep painful void…I just miss Saif already…

Breaking up isn’t new to me…but I never thought I’ll be the one to end my relationship with him…

6arig my ex and I lost touch and we slowly drifted apart when I stumbled on him with another girl…did I cry?...yes I shed a few tears but it felt nothing like this….not even close…

At the table:

“Yuma Joury shfeech?”
“hala?”
“shaklich bachya” at this moment 9ali7 entered
“salam 3alikom” he kissed his mothers forehead and sat on the seat next to mine…
"wa3alaikom isalam"
“Joury mama? Fee a7ad imza3lich?”
“laa mako shay 5alty…mu nayma 3adel that’s all”
“ee ashwa…yalla inshala ilayla tit3adal nomtich…jarbay il labna wiza3tar mayti6awaf”
“hehehe inshala”

9ali7 kept looking back at me but I ignored him…pretended he wasn’t there.

“Joury…mishayna?”
“emm…wa”
“WAIN?!”
“bismela! Lulu!”
“Lulu awal mara ashoofich chithy” 5alty said happily…

It’s true Lulu was kind of dead the last few months…after the accident that is…bas it looks like she’s turning around inshala…

“mufaj2a” he said… WHAT SURPRISE?! I DON’T WANT TO GO ANYWHERE RIGHT NOW! SPECIALLY WITH HIM!!

“5ala9 you kids have fun”

He got up and I followed…

“tamrooni 3ala shay?”
“salamtik”

I tried acting as normal as I could…

“wain binroo7?”
“inyeblich 5a6…wela tabeeni ana anagee?”

Oh…il5a6 ilydeed…tisk…ufff…

“yala”

I got into the car with him…we were both silent throughout the drive….i hate this…I hate what he’s doing…I hate it!! It’s my life and If I want to see Saif then I will…it’s my life….right?

As soon as he gets me the new number I’m telling Saif to get me a new line…I love Saif and I’m not about to lose him…not yet…

No…I’m not going to call him with this cell…when I go home…I’ll call him from the land line….i’ve made up my mind…Saif and I are going to keep seeing eachother…that’s it!

At the shop:

“Joury?”
“hmm?”

He smiled at me but then he quickly hid it…pretending he was upset with me…like I meant less to him…

I don’t care… he smiled….he smiled…he can’t take it back…he doesn’t have to do this…he doesn’t have to act this way towards me…

“which one?” he showed me a bunch of numbers and asked me to pick one…
“it doesn’t matter”
“mayhimich ikooon ra8mich 7ilo? 3ayal laish yaya?”
“ugh! Give it to me”

I took the papers and I scrolled my eyes on the numbers that were available…I felt his eyes on me…I could feel him breathing on my neck…that’s how close he was…seriously does he not know what it means to have personal space?

I chose a number that was surprisingly better than my last…though I love my old number…

“ok…pick another one”
“huh? Emm…why?”
“Lulu” awww that’s sweet…no focus! He’s not sweet…he’s ruining my life!

I looked back at the papers…

I concentrated hard on it…after all Lulu deserves the best….

“You know what give her the number I picked out earlier and I’ll take whichever” I said still focusing on the paper in my hand…

“No”

I looked up at him confused as to why he said no…I mean it’s what I want! I want her to have the number I picked out for me…

“Why?”
“pick her another…shoofay I like this one shrayich?” he showed me the number…it was easy and it wasn’t bad..not bad at all…I actually liked it.
“7ilo”
“9ij?”
“mhmm” I nodded
“5ala9 3ayal…6al 3omrek abby hal ra8main”
“inzain shofeelaha mobile ma3ay…it has to be big and easy…mu Blackberry aw hal 5arabee6”

“ok…big and easy…got it” I saw a tiny smile in his face.
I went over to the phones to pick something out…it has to be something Lulu can use easily…
“excuse me”

An attractive guy turned towards me…scratch that…an extremely attractive guy…

“yes ma’am can I help you” his accent…my god! It totally ruined his look…
“yes please..i’d like to buy a phone” he interrupted me
“oh we have the latest phones you’ll love them…specially for a beautiful lady such as yourself” I giggled.
“you have a beautiful smile…”

All of a sudden I felt a wall behind…seriously like someone was glued to my back…
I turned my head not moving away and saw him…god this so like him…the guy didn’t mean it!!..he wants to sell phones why is he always overprotective!

“can we see your phones” he asked strictly business….
“yes sir…” he kept looking back at me and 9ali7.
“these are the new and improved Nokia phones…we have Iphones and blackberries if you’d like…we also have”
“no no…we need something easy…”
“easy?”
“we need a phone that’s simple and easy…emm...big numbers *waving my hands about trying to explain what were looking for*”

After looking at numerous phones we picked one lulu won’t have a hard time with…simple yet up-to-date and stylish.

I think it’s sweet 9ali7 is doing this for her…I love how he cares about us…anything we wanted he’ll make sure we have it…except for my Saif..ugh! god if only they would get along and he’ll know we’re serious about each other…we LOVE each other what more does he need to know before he realizes that Saif and I belong together?!!

We got into his car …he turned to look at me.

“Joury”
“hmm?” I didn’t face him…
“tadreen inich ‘3alya 3alay…o0 lo makan lich ma3aza chan ma sawait illy swaita”he said lovingly…
“9ali7 I don’t want t talk about it”
“shofaay Joury…ayshay at7amala wela inich tiz3eleen miny” my heart ached…I didn’t know what I felt but I ignored it…it was 9ali7 after all..

“mu za3lana…” I barely said
“akeeed?”
“itha gilt la2 shbitsawee?” I asked really interested in his answer…
“awareeech shbasawy” he said devilishly… he started the car…
“wain binroo7?”
“mu za3lana 3alay?” he asked with a smile and his head tilting ever so slightly…
“mm?”
“5ala9 3ayal you’ll see…”

For those few minutes I totally and completely forgot about Saif…it’s like it was just me and 9ali7…alone..

He drove off…I was somewhat excited…but I had my mind set…I’m getting back together with Saif…I think…so no harm done really…I just have to make sure I keep it from 9ali7.
Otherwise all hell is going to break loose…I mean I have the right to be with the one I want…right?

GOD THIS SO COMPLICATED!!

I feel like something is telling me not to do this…not to go running towards Saif…it feels so wrong but…ugh!!! I hate it when things get complicated I can’t think straight at all!!!

“Joury shfeech?”
“ha? Emm nothing”
“akeed?”
“YES WILL YOU STOP SAYING THAT?!!” all of a sudden I was angry and frustrated…ugh! He doesn’t deserve it…..maybe he does…. I just feel all over the place…

He was quiet with that frustrated look of his looking at me every now and then….I felt bad…god! He’s like the only person I can’t hurt…I just can’t.

“I’m sorry.” I whispered
“6aaf…ha shtabeen insaawee?” something I love about 9ali7…he puts things behind him as fast as you can say “water under the bridge”

“emm kayfik…oh!… *looking at me*…la 5ala9”
“goolay”
“emm…aby Ice-cream…”
“bas ice-cream? Affa 3alaich”

We saw the man on the ice-cream bike….3araftoo? illy ebee3 ice-cream KDD….

“OH!! 9ali7 abbee min hatha!!”
“*laughing* inshala”

We stopped near him and got us our ice-creams….

He then parked near the beach and we went out for a walk…

While eating my ice-cream I kept wondering what Saif is doing right now? is it ok that I’m out with 9ali7…the person who’s keeping me away from Saif after I broke up with him yesterday?

Does it look good that I’m out with him the very next day I end my relationship with Saif….a 2 year relationship?

We kept walking side by side along the beach…
“Joury”
“hala?”
“bakalmich ibmaw’6oo3” CRAP HERE IT COMES ;S
“ok?”
“Saif…awal wa7d itkalmeena?” MY GOD!!! WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSE TO SAY?!!!
“huh?”
“jawbeeny Joury…mara7 a39eb” he said calmly…

Is this a trick? What if he does get mad…

“I’ll take that as a no?” he stopped and turned to look at me…

I really felt like I was cornered…nowhere to run….

“kintay ma3a wa7ed gabel Saif?” I nodded

He clenched his jaw but tried his best to remain cool…in my eyes he failed…I know him…he’s not happy.

“bas hatha?” he asked

“9ali7 what do you want?!”

“I want the truth…Saif o0 ilgabla ilwa7eedeen?”

I looked away….i can’t say it! Shlon?!! No actually the total number of guys I was with are 4?!!! He’ll kill me!!
“Joury”
“Joury 6al3eeny”

I turned back to see him…

“bas hal ithnayn?”I shook my head..

WHY AM I TELLING HIM?!!

IT’S LIKE I CAN’T CONTROL ANYTHING…HE ASKS I ANSWER!

“cham wa7ed?”
“9ali7 please” a tear found its way down my cheek…

He cupped my face and wiped it with his thumb ever so softly…

For a moment just a tiny ity bity moment I was staring back at him…for the first time I looked at him differently…I quickly shook that thought away…

“Joury jawbeeny” he pleaded softly

“….why?..” I whispered

“I need to know”

“what for?”

“Joury bas jawbeeny”

“*deep breath* two before Saif and 6ariq” he stiffened up…I can see pain in his eyes…something I never want to cause him…

“arba3a?” he asked back

I looked down and nodded…

“laish Joury? Laish?” he asked sadly and lovingly…

You know when you feel this burning sensation in your chest and you can’t help it…your tears are dying to come out…I felt that…

My tears fell while I shivered from the pain.
I dug my face in my hands…next thing I felt was a warm broad chest embracing me…for the first time his scent was soothing…relaxing…I ruined his shirt

“5ala9 Joury…stop crying”
“I want to go home”
“you’re sleeping over 3inda ilyoom”I didn’t feel like arguing…we got back to his car and we went back home….

“Joury ‘3alach 3indy mat’3ayar….Saif oo ‘3aira mintay shayfa”

It hurts hearing that…but it also pissed me off ishwaya…I mean I know he’s looking out for me…but it’s my life and I choose how to live it.

I walked in and we went looking for Lulu…

“LULU!!!! LUUUUU LUUUUUUU!!! LULUUUWAAAAAAAAA!! WAINICH?!”
“NA3AAAAM?..... FOOOOOOG!!! IN MY ROOOM”
“OKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY”

9ali7 was laughing softly trying his best to act cool…

We went up to her….i jumped on her bed…

“waaay Joury tara that scares me!”
“sorry….inzain 9ali7 has something for you”
“we have something for you” I turned to look at him…I liked the fact he added my name to her gift….madree it was sweet of him…

“what??!!” she smiled…it’s been so long since I saw her smile this way…
“i5theee awal shay”

He handed her the box….he sat next to her and I sat close by.

I helped her with her box….

It wasn’t long before she realized it was a cell…

“ambaay mashkooreeen…..emm…bas….”
“you’ll get this…I promise” kibar ib3ainee…he’s always put us first and it’s something I hope never changes…

That night we spent in her room as she learned to memorize where every number lied.
Every now and then 9ali7 would look at me with a soft smile…it was…I don’t know…comfortable…It felt right..

It felt right?!! Ugh! What’s with me?...i miss Saif…it’s been 2 days since I last talked to him….during our 2 year relationship not a day goes by without Saif and I talking…

I just want to hear his voice…to just know I’m still his….when you can’t have something it makes you want it even more….and I just want Saif…it’s true…
……………………………………………………

Lulu:

9ali7 and Joury surprised me with my new phone…I knew 9ali7 was getting me a phone but I didn’t think he’ll get it this fast …it didn’t take long before I memorized where every digit was…
…………………………………………………….
Joury:

Two weeks passed since I talked to Saif…I haven’t contacted him…every minute of every day he’s in my mind…it’s so hard…I just want that man back.

I feel so…alone?

I’m not sure….but I’ve spent most of my time with Lulu…

I’m taking her to the beach tomorrow…she needs to leave this place…to breathe a little...ugh! I
just want to hear his voice…just for a minute…

I walked towards the phone near my bed…I dialed his number…I just wanted to hear his voice again…it rang…I sat on my bed…waiting…

After 3 rings…I panicked..should I hang up? I mean what if 9ali7 finds out…but It was too late…crap!
“aloo?” god…his voice felt like a knife in my heart…it had that effect…
“……”
“aloo?”
………………………………………………………………….

Saif answered his phone not realizing that his Joury was on the other side…hearing him…

“aloo?!”

“S..” Joury was about to hang up when….

“Joury?” he asked carefully?
“…….”
“Joury?!”
“hi” Joury felt nice when she heard his voice.
“JOURY?! SBOO3AIN?!!! SBOO3AIN?!!”

During that 2 week period Saif lost it…he missed her…he missed his Joury and not being able to contact her or reach her drove him insane…

He went over to her house a few times but didn’t want any of her family to suspect anything and a lot of the times he noticed she wasn’t home…

The first time he realized she wasn’t home at 11:30pm he walked up to the maid and asked her bluntly about Joury’s where abouts fearing she might be hurt in a hospital…or worse…the maid informed Saif that Joury was in fact sleeping over at her cousins.

Saif was relieved but wasn’t completely satisfied with the answer…he felt what most men feel….Jealousy…why is his Joury spending the night at 9ali7’s place?!

Back to the convo…

“I’m sorry”
“shino sorry?!!! Shfaydat sorry?!! Joury abee ashoufich il7een” Joury felt like she just made a mistake but….it was a good mistake….she missed him and she wanted him back.
“Saif…I can’t”
“JOURRY!! ….walla Joury walla ayey baitkom” that scared her…

She knew Saif rasa yabes and when he wants something he’ll get it…

She’s never seen this side of him before…he was always sweet and caring…he never asked her for anything…

“tomorrow”
“when and where?”
“in the morning… the beach…baroo7 ma3a Lulu”
“5ala9…bacher atfaham weyach…famanalla”

This was different…Saif was weird…these 2 weeks brought out the frustration in him…plus at times he feels he has no control his temper overtakes him…in this case it could easily be jealousy.
……………………………………………..
Joury:

After ending that phone call I was slightly afraid but mostly excited to see him…9ali7 doesn’t have to know…I mean I can’t say I haven’t tried…I did…for 2 weeks…but…I love him.

The next morning:

I got ready and dressed….i wore my green juicy trainings…tied my light brown hair into a ponytail…applied thin eye-liner…mascara…tanning blush and slightly dapped some gloss on my lips for that extra shine “awake” look.

I drove over to Lulu’s…she too wore her comfy purple juicy trainings…I applied her make-up …this was the first time since the accident that she’s let me apply it on her…she’s getting better I can tell….but not as fast as we’ve hoped…Inshala it’ll change…

“hunny bunzz!! Yala we’re wasting our time here”
“yala…wainich?”
“here…*going over to her*” I held her arm and directed her down the stairs and into my car…
………………………….
In the car…

I told her about Saif and to say she was angry wouldn't do it any justice…she was disappointed…but she understood why.
“whatever makes you happy Jay…bas I swear if he breaks your heart his ass is mine” I laughed…she was getting better…I liked that she’s using humor again…I hope it remains this way.
“Jay?”
“yeah?”
“if 9ali7 finds out I had nothing to do with this”
“he’s not going to…and of course you had nothing to do with it”
“good….’cause I know how mad he’ll get if he finds out”
“stop it you’re scarying me”
“someone should”

We arrived and I parked my car…

We went for a walk near the beach on the smooth path way…my heart was racing…he has no clue what my number is or how to find me but knowing Saif he’ll find me...

“Joury?” his voice came from behind…

We both turned….ok…more like I turned pulling Lulu with me…it’s a good thing she didn’t fall.

“WATCH IT!”
“sorry!” I looked back at him…his eyes were serious…

“shlonich lulu?”
“emm il7imdella?”
“shda3wa nesaiteeny?”

I kept my eye on Saif as his friend tried starting a conversation with Lulu

I felt her grip tighten.

“I don’t even know you”

“shrayich nitmasha?”

I knew then why his friend was there…to take Lulu away for us to talk…his friend was familiar….god where have I seen him before?...